Thursday, June 20, 2013
Today began the first full day of my earthly journey without the physical presence of my mother somewhere "nearby." Yesterday she passed into the big mystery, as I like to say.
I find myself wafting between moments of utility, memory, smiles, occasional laughter and tearful floods. It feels as if a plug has been pulled somewhere within my being, and that some part of me is draining out. Like the hole that my mother's passing has left for me, I wonder what will fill these spaces.
In the meantime I honor my grief, mourn my loss, celebrate her life … a life that was integral to mine and to shaping me into the being I am ~ right here in this moment.
I offer infinite gratitude for our relationship, for this brave and tenacious woman was strong enough to take on my spirit. I've often said, especially in her later years, that she may have only been as big as your little finger, but she was giant force of power.
She had to be.
She was my mother.